Once upon a time, Mummy had strong, unwavering views on ‘the bedtime routine’. She had read the baby books, she had watched half an episode of Supernanny, she was sold on that Holy Trinity of ‘bath, book, bed’…she KNEW that consistency, patience and loving reassurance would teach her little cherub to skip off to bed with a spring in her step, a song in her heart, and a deeply ingrained desire to be fast asleep between the hours of 7pm and 7am.

Then, Mummy actually HAD a child… 🙈🤦‍♀️😂

Mummy has long since given up on the nightly bath, given that this tends to involve at least 15 minutes of coaxing her water-resistant offspring into it, 20 minutes of ear-shattering wails of “IT’S IN MY EYES!!!” and a half-dozen slippery laps around the bathroom chasing a dripping-wet preschooler…NO ONE has the time or sanity for that shit every day. Read more