So, I was Googling ‘Bing’ to prove to my husband that Coco is voiced by Topsy from ‘Topsy & Tim’ (because that’s the kind of important stuff we argue about these days) and it says that there are 78 episodes of this CBeebies stalwart in total.

SEVENTY EIGHT?!?

Since bloody when???

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I’ve watched the same half a dozen on repeat for over two years now; thief Bing, murderer Bing, phone-smasher Bing, shit-at-sharing Bing, duck-botherer Bing and snotty Bing – I could probably recite them line by line… and now you’re telling me there are MORE??

How do I unlock this magical secret content? Do I have to prove to the CBeebies Gods that I deserve it by doing something REALLY hardcore, like sitting through 20 episodes of ‘Show Me, Show Me’ without dying of boredom?

And more importantly, what if these hidden gems are those dramatic series cliffhangers I’ve been waiting for; do we ever find out where Bing’s parents have buggered off to? Is Padget and Flop’s (blatant) secret love affair FINALLY revealed? Is Flop caught cruising drunkenly about the countryside on Talkie Taxi after a particularly trying day with Bing, downing copious amounts of tequila from Brenda the Blender??

J and I spend WAY too much time discussing the dark side of kid’s TV… here are some of the conversations that I’m absolutely convinced our fave characters are having behind closed doors:

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And people say I don’t spend my evenings productively…

Mum Muddling Through
Life Love and Dirty Dishes

17 thoughts on “The secret lives of kid’s TV characters

  1. Hahaha!! Brilliant. I’ve always thought the PAW Patrol were Ryder’s sentient slave dogs who must always be ‘good pups’ (i.e. save lives, respond to trivial emergencies at the whim of the idiots of adventure bay) if they ever want to eat or have fun. Do they get paid? Do they get holiday? Something dodgy going on there, deffo. #CoolMumClub

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Brilliant – I think I zone out when this kind of drivel is on, and I actually kinda like Bing! Is that true about Topsy?! Off to google and questioning my enthusiasm about this nugget of useless information ;-|
    Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub

    Liked by 1 person

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